Something tonight has prompted me to come back to this. Something I just feel as though I can't write about anywhere else.
Life lost too soon and in too silly and selfish a way.
A little over six months ago one of my dearest and oldest friends died from an accidental drug overdose. Yes, I'm still cross with him.
And I'm sad, really really sad.
I miss him every day but every now and then it just overwhelms me. I won't ever see him again. And we will never grow old together, which we had planned to do!
G and I met when we started kindy together at the age of 3. He was always a bit odd or maybe "half mad", just like Alice in the new Wonderland film, " All the best people are, you know".
A truly kindred spirit.
We went on to primary school together and it just felt like I'd always known him. He was a definite, a constant part of my life.
As adults I think we really came to appreciate each other and were better friends than ever before. G was the celebrant at my wedding and the godparent to my children. A stayer.
It's funny you know, there's the cliche, "time heals all wounds". I don't think time is healing this one very well at all. In fact I feel as thought the more time that passes; the longer it is since I've seen him, since he has embraced me, since I have heard his voice.
Maybe more time is what's needed.
However much time is required to dull the pain, I know that the memory of a truly wonderful man will never be dulled. My children and I speak about G regularly and his influence on our lives and our hearts will always remain.
I miss you G. We all miss you.